 Pastor Sunday Adelaja:  THE FAMILY MONTH (Anointing service in July)
Pastor Sunday Adelaja:  THE FAMILY MONTH (Anointing service in July)
It is not a secret that the institution of family is the most ancient  and important one among all other social institutions that exist on  Earth.
The LORD God said, It is not  good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him. (Genesis 2:18) This Scripture tells us  that the Author of the institution of family is God. Therefore, when it  comes to family issues, there is no source more trustworthy than the  Word of God and His instructions.
Genesis 2:23-24: The man said, This is now bone of my bones and flesh  of my flesh; she shall be called ’woman, for she was taken out of man.  For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to  his wife, and they will become one flesh. Proverbs 18:22: He who finds a wife finds what is  good and receives favor from the LORD. When people – men and women –  find each other, they bring good into each other’s lives. 
 Unfortunately, in these last days the institution of family is  undergoing serious attacks, such as:
1.    Civil unionBy using this term people, who do not wish to take responsibility for  building a family, simply cohabit. While not registering there status as  married people, they show their light-minded attitude to family; this  attitude shows lack of dedication, loyalty, and sacrifice to each other.
2.    Homosexuality forms a distorted understanding of  the role of men and women in family.
3.    Sexual relationships and pregnancy at early age (15-16  years old). This problem has become the plague of the modern  society.
However, in spite of these problems, there is an instrument, which God  wants to use to restore the institute of family. This instrument is  Church.
What 
values of the institute of family should the Body of Christ  bring in their families and the world to fulfill God’s desire?
1.    Mutual love. You will need it both to create and  maintain a family.
2.    Loyalty. Without loyalty from both of the spouses  no family can endure.
3.    Mutual sacrifice. Sacrifice is the guarantee of a long  and happy family life.
4.    Mutual forgiveness. Family can endure any test if  man and wife can forgive each other.
5.    Humbleness, mutual submission. In other words, spouses  must be able to step back, humble themselves, and accept the side of the  other ad their own.
6.    Patience. With this value any family will stand firm and  go through any trials.
7.    Mutual trust. Trust between spouses will make a  family strong and enduring to all kinds of circumstances.
8.    Unity
9.    Reverence, mutual respect
10.    Dedication, common work
11.    Communication
12.    Faith. This value implies faith in each other and faith  in God, and submission to God’s principles.

If you observe all the abovementioned values, it will make your family  strong and durable.
Philippians 2:3-5: Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in  humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look  not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.  Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus. This Scripture  shows that only through the work of both spouses a family has a  full-fledged and prosperous life.You can ask me: if God is the Author of the institute of life, them why  do we see so many broken families these days? What can become a reason  to a broken family?
1.    Lack of knowledge in men and women. Many get married not  having prepared fully for marriage. The epistle to 
Ephesians 5:22-25 tells  us about two main principles, on which family is built.
First principle is that 
man needs to be honored and respected. 
Wives, submit to your husbands as  to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the  head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the  church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands  in everything. (Verses 22-24)
The second principle in family relationship is that a 
woman  needs love and attention. 
Husbands,  love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up  for her. (Verse 25).
2.    Adultery and infidelity is another reason of distraction  of marriage. Without mutual dedication and trust your family is doomed.
3.    Many people create their families, while having 
abnormal  demands and expectations from their future spouse.  But the  truth is that you should never focus on the things you can receive from  your spouse, but on what you can give. For example, their belief is such  that only the husband should reach for success, and the calling of wife  is to support her husband’s hands. The truth is that every one is born  to fulfill their own calling, and it is a part of spouses’ personal  mission to support each other’s hands. You must not get married unless  you have established your own identity and have a clear vision of your  personal calling!
4.    Absence of quality communication can also destroy your  family.
5.    Failure in family life happens when 
spouses  do not wish to work on themselves (not on each other, but on  themselves). You just need to want to change! If you are ready to change  and understand that a happy family life is not possible without changes  (sacrifices) from the sides of both spouses, then your relationship  will endure everything!
6.    Unforgiveness between spouses. Without forgiveness any  family relationship will be torn apart. never wait for the guilty one to  ask for forgiveness, - be first to forgive.
7.    Family is doomed if you get used to each other so much that you  show this kind of 
buddy-buddy manners (loss of  respect and interest in one other; boredom, apathy). Therefore  you need to renew your relationship all the time; find new things in  your spouse and value the person given to you by God.
8.    Unwillingness to work on yourself and your marriage. If  you remain at the same level as you were at the point of wedding, your  family relationship will soon “die”. Family is a living organism, which  is supposed to grow and develop naturally. If spouses do not grow, their  relationships are doomed, for when we do not develop, we do not even  stay on the same level, but move backwards.
Therefore, my brothers and sisters let us work on ourselves and apply  these principles and observe the true values in your family as well as  help each other to create strong and happy families. Today the  institution of marriage desperately needs reformation! The revival of  the initial model of family created by God depends only those, who not  only know, but practice these principles in their families!
In order to study this topic more thoroughly, I recommend  reading the following books: “Successful Marriage Takes Work”, “Men’s  happiness. Women’s happiness” – by pastor Sunday Adelaja.
May the Lord bless you and your family!